Google Unveils Nexus Q, Unwittingly Brings Manliness Back to America

By Marco Moreno Flores

The technocratic overlords at Google unveiled yet another device to improve how efficiently you procrastinate: the Nexus Q. The Nexus Q is a home server device that looks like a magic eight ball with a glow stick wrapped around it. While its slick 80’s-like design alone would make it desirable, the Nexus Q allows users to synch devices ranging from Android phones to TV’s and laptops… wirelessly. Think of it this way: you and a bunch of friends are hanging out, you can each contribute songs from your phone to one single playlist. Meanwhile, on your TV you can all switch between movies any of you might own or rent through Google Play and/or Youtube, making smart-alecky remarks until you settle on one to watch. All in all, it will make escaping the harsh realities of your life that much more entertaining.

Of further note, the Nexus Q is made in the United States of America, a move which is being applauded by the Boston Consulting Groups as the beginning of an American “manufacturing Renaissance.” Isn’t it time that Americans re-learned how to build things? Isn’t it just a little scary that the chair you’re sitting in, the monitor you’re reading this on, the underwear you’re wearing… were in all probability made in a country that has several nuclear warheads aimed at us? Apparently Google has seen the light, as Google Vice president Andy Rubin told the New York Times, “We’ve been absent (from the U.S.) for so long, we decided, why don’t we try it and see what happens?” What might happen, Andy Rubin? America might go from a limp-wristed Facebook addicted twenty-something year old to a fully-grown man who takes care of business.